Beautiful words, ugly illness

10 Feb

Just discovered this website Depression Marathon, full of beautiful words about an ugly illness. The writer is candid and bold, harnessing writing as a response to the black clouds that engulf her. She also runs to combat her lows. I felt inspired as I read her posts – coping with depression requires courage, honesty and a willingness to ask for help. None of us can make it on our own. Yet asking for help can seem like the hardest thing in the world. In fact, it’s sometimes easier to write about depression on a (very public) blog than to talk about it with close friends and family. Ironic but true. I don’t want to use this blog as a means of avoiding real-time conversations with real people, that would not be brave. But I do want to use it to put some of my struggles out there, in the hope that others find hope in the breaking-of-silence.

Today I am recognising again that life rarely proceeds in the way we expect. Or want. Maybe periods of depression are simply part of the journey. Some of the lows amidst life’s highs. I feel low right now. I feel alone, isolated by my feelings and confused thoughts. I need to say it, put it out there – so that it does not swallow me up, so that it cannot engulf me.

I took hope from reading someone else’s blog, someone else’s honest struggles today. I hope my blog helps at least one other person in the same way today.

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